heh... talk about Procrastination, seems ill never be able to keep a good journal here..
Really there isnt much time, im always doing something... productive or not im always doing something

the entry i was going to write was going to be about the events that happened around that time..

But i've decided not to, because it's been way too long and it doesnt really matter now.

hmm.. college..... interesting place. I LOVE IT!

I love meeting the new people and i love having music in my life 24/7

EVERY freakin day i see music. AND i dont get tired of it, except my solo I DONT LIKE it... IF anyone still listens to music like that look up Fantasia for Euphonium and Band or just for Euphonium... this piece is not too hard.. YET confusing.. and its freakin emo and the intervals frustrate me sooo much! BUT its a standard piece that everyone needs to learn. so its a must.

CHISME!!!
So this guy has the nerve to write me a letter blaming me for ALL the little pot heads at United South! or CLASS of 09 as he calls and loves them so much. fuck it IMMA JUST COPY PASTE THAT SHIT and ill let anyone who reads xanga read it.. cuz it really pissed me off.. i mean wow he fuckin threatened me and william so bad and i was scared for a while. and i honestly was gonna get a restraining order so i could fuck with his life a bit as well, but oh well ... heres the letter... oh and by the way it was Chris who wrote this! .... if u dont know him i wouldnt blame u .. so ask me if u want

http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"> name="ProgId" content="Word.Document"> name="Generator" content="Microsoft Word 12"> name="Originator" content="Microsoft Word 12">Hey, How's it been. I'm about to go crazy right about now. First of all. I like to congratulate for destroying the lives of the memebers of the Class of 09 at United South. I want to start by sayinh HOW COULD YOU!!!!!!! You should be ashamed of yourself. You and your fellow potheads. Your such a pothead. You better stop, or get arrested. Because if your don't, I'm coming for you. You introduced it to William and he brought it to the others. You even had help from Ray. Want to know what I've been doing all this time. I've been making a life for myself. In the first month of Kingsville I realized that there's so much more out there than music. I'm a Biology major. I'm going all the way up in three years. While it takes you five for your pitiful Bachelor's in Music. Music is just a form of entertainment. But that's not the point. The point is the music program has a weed problem and because of your actions that problem has spread to United South. I'm going to stop it by making an example out of William. I have friends. And if you don't know I have ALOT of friends. Frist I'll make an example out of some seniors, then I'll deal with you. I HATE YOU. CHANGE, GET ARRESTED, or I'm going after you. I'll make sure you get the life in prison and never get the career you want. Remember I have alot of GOOD DECENT FRIENDS. My friend Merc died, the thing you should know is that his Grandpa is a judge. After he died his Grandpa has been on a war path with young adults for what happened to Merc.. Just to let you know.


oh and by the way... this guy that same weekend was out "partying" with the high school seniors and later passed out in someone's car.... SURE... im the bad influence... whatever man fuckin drama.... I quit smoking a while back for my sorority.. IM IN DRY RUSH.. which mean no drugs no alcohol during the rush process... I'm changing...... and hell no did I DO that to that class.. they all just randomly started coming out of the "weed closet"

no more.. on this it sux... but i will do something about it.... im gonna make sure he gets the help he needs so that he doesnt one day snap and do the unthinkable... ITS  a precaution.. i have to.

well thats the big whoop here with me.. this ass just made my month suck! so .. f him and f all his little high school bullshit.. IM DONE WITH THAT SHIT... thats in the freakin past... BUT whatever.. at least i dont go back to high school in order to get "friends" as he calls him.

I was going over a lot of my past entries.. and wow.. this thing is amazing.. (xanga) IF it wasnt for xanga i wouldnt be able to remember all the great memories that i have.. i mean i didnt remember a lot of it.. by myself.. it wasn't until i red these entries that i remember all those awesome times and how freakin emo i was.. i will admit i was acting like a little emo putita.. lol

i dunno its such a good feeling when i'm reading it .. i mean now i remember the exact dates of when things happened.. lol its soo kool.. so i MUST TRY to keep xanga alive.. lol at least for me.. so that i can remember all these awesome or .. not so awesome memories.

well now lets see whats up in my life..

im a freakin senior.. and im about to graduate..

my mind was set on UT Austin.. for college.. and then something just hit me.. and i know Karen mi hermanita wont believe me .. but im doing this for myself.. and not for the other reason and u know what that is..

Music is a huge part of me.. Yea i can be a psychologist and still play my instrument.. BUT how will my life be?... i would be doing something yea interesting.,....but not as interesting as a life with music all around me forever... I want to be one of those judges for UIL or All state and i want people to say something like " she's from laredo, and she knows what she's talking about and she has accomplished .. Blah lol.. something like that.

and.. although it may not be a great pay.. lol .. i know that i will be doing something i like.. for the rest of my life.. and if i fuck up or anything there's always nursing at LCC lol... i WILL DO THAT if i fuck up my life.. MOCK MY WORDS .. i will lol..

so .. continuing.. UT is awesome.. its big its beautiful, its fun and i love it.. but i love the place more than whats important. Kingsville is kind of all the opposite.. its small.. smaller than laredo... its OLD as fuck .. lol and its SMALL lol.. and boring THEY DONT HAVE A MALL lol..  BUT i like the music program .. its f ' n good from what i have been shown and "advertised" lol..  i have to do something on my own.. not having Karen there is gonna make it a lot more difficult than it already is.

I'm just afraid that we'll get distant.. i cant imagine my sister like that.. the way my mom speaks to her sisters with such respect.. like " hola como has hestado... how have u been.. how are ur kids.. " *kiss and handshake* NOT that thats bad ... but that seems a little distant .... i dunno if people who read this will follow.. but i wanna be able to go up to karen and hug her and say "KE ONDA VATO! .. whats up dude.. how's the life i miss u soo much and dude u have no idea what happened".. and then  like play games or something

I dont want to be distant from my family either.. BUT HAVING KAREN like that.. wow that would break my heart.

I love u Karen and i never want us to be like that.. I'm gonna miss u.. I'm gonna miss u a lot.

well i totally.. left this and never came back .. lol .. its been a while since i was at the computer.. lol its now 1:30 AM on my clock.. good night people and i will try to update this thing a lot now..

LOVE U ALL -Cindy